give my dog a bath cause it literally smells like shit
vegas for thanksgiving
hawaii for christmas(?) (I just noticed like, how am I supposed to bring my shampoo and stuff to hawaii since we’re taking a plane and I’m picky as fuck about stuff like this I CANNOT USE A SHAMPOO AND CONDITIONER OTHER THAN MY OWN IT DOESN’T WORK THAT WAY)
you can just put it in your checked bag, the liquid ounce bs laws only apply to carry-ons
I don’t think Kim Kardashian should be allowed to get the divorce. We have to protect the sanctity of marriage, and how am I supposed to explain to my kid that she got divorced only 72 days after the wedding?! And next thing you know, divorced people are going to be teachers in school, and putting their divorce agenda into the textbooks, and I certainly don’t want my children learning that disgusting stuff in school! You're oppressing me!!!!!
If there’s anyone who thinks their ‘how am I going to explain gay marriage to my kids’ argument doesn’t sound this silly, they’re wrong and stupid.